Monday, November 8, 2010

It's been a while, hasn't it, and I am thoroughly sorry -_- I've done exactly what always makes me upset when it happens in the blogs I read--I up and left without any warning whatsoever. But you also must understand, I am not the most consistent person...

I go up and down with pleasure, after treading numbness for a while. That's all these last few weeks have been filled with, that numbness...and college applications of course. And standardized tests, which made me purge for the first time in a month, an impulsive defense against whatever atrocious results I may have received. Not that it really matters; I flip my middle finger at the world, putting the image on repeat inside my head. It never gets old. But for every second I scream IDGAF, there's another second that's spent panicking in spite of myself.
Same old same old, I guess. Except I have a physical next Friday. I hope I didn't (hope I did) lose weight on that all-knowing scale. I hope they don't ask questions.


  1. yes it has! much dissatisfaction from here. i still love you though. school stress. tell me about it. good luck at the doctor's. xx io

  2. i missed you i did.
    i got the fuck it feeling eith school tests right now. that is until i get the results.

  3. Hey it's okay, I missed you a lot but I want you to be happy. Remember that you deserve better, and should seek better.

    You don't need the numbers to be less, because the numbers screw with everything.

    Just live and breathe and know that it's okay to be sad sometimes, just as it's okay to be happy.

    I love you. <3

  4. i'm glad you're writing again.

    just breathe.
    you will be okay.