
Oh my gods. I'm really quite stupid. Crashing hard because I can, and because I missed being here in this world. So I numbed myself down as much as I could, and I revelled in beautiful photographs and your beautiful angels' words.

Almost my one-year anniversary with M. He still does not know how to help me, and insists I am pushing him away. When we are together we are chemistry and laughter; when we are apart I feel needy and used and he feels nothing. I wish I could feel nothing.
